Learning to breathe again

Obviously, yes,  every part of my body is aching tonight. Most especially my wrists and my arms. I am not young anymore. I am not that flexible as before. I cannot reach my toes, I cannot lift or twist my body like I used to do, but surprisingly, I still can lift my butt with that certain yoga position, i can do the child's post and keep my balance but definitely, not that locust position.

That one in the picture you're looking at, that's after my very first basic yoga class. I asked my yoga teacher to take a photo of me for this blog and as souvenir. A photo that would remind me that I was able to survive my first yoga class.

I was able to keep up with the rest of my yoga classmates. I scrambled while following the  instructions of the yoga teacher who can do all the positions with ease, with impeccable balance, with great stamina.

What do you expect from a tired Mom? lols!  I work. I am a very busy woman. My body and mind are both working, besides this, I try  maintain good relationships, family, advocacies , a lot of stuff in that level too and I also try to handle every stress the world is throwing in my face everyday.

I do a lot of things. Every time, I go to sleep, I would always think on what I will prepare for breakfast the next day. Working does not end with deadlines and outputs, it also ends head aches and migraines, with leg cramps, and aching feet and back aches and worst, stress eating.  Signs of aging as they say.

However, lately, I try to listen to my body. I listen to every part of it. I try to feel my internal organs. and then I consciously take mental notes on what I eat and how it affects my body - do I feel healthy? Do i feel sluggish? Do I feel alert and active? Do I feel depressed? Do I lack motivation? or does my brain stop working. Do I easily get tired?

These "feelings" I observed for a month. And apparently,there are certain foods that affect my emotions and my body. So, I again took a mental note on it. Too much sugar is bad, it made me sluggish. Caffeine, it perks me up, but too much of it, dehydrates me - my list of mental notes about bad eating habits, sleeping and stressful lifestyle goes on.
Thank you for my yoga teacher, Lorenza, who took this photo at PowerMax Gym
So, I again, observed myself.  And I came to this conclusion. I live in a very fast world, my hands (and even my mind) is always full. I multi-task a lot. For example, while doing the laundry, I attend my on-line class, and while I have 40 minutes for drying the laundry, I do the grocery or buy school supplies for the girls. The positive thing about this is that I guess it makes me alert.

But the number one in the list that I have to cross out is I eat too fast.  And that is not good. I have to chew the food, slowly. My stomach does not have teeth, hello. Indigestion and heartburn are  my new friends lately. There was this one night that I could not breathe. I felt that there's a heavy thing on my chest. and I was alarmed.

My number two in my list is  I do not exercise. I always say I miss and I should go back to dancing, but it was always a wishful thinking. I'd like to thank my best-friend here who dragged me to the yoga class and promised me a free movie after as a reward.

 My number three in my list is that I am over compassionate. I sometimes shoulder the problem of others' responsibility while my own responsibilities are still unresolved. I got easily stressed out, diving into others problems, while I have my own to solve.

Those are just three in my lists. I have to say check on the first and second but I just can't help not to be affected by friend's problems or any one in need, so I cannot promise that. For now.

However, I know that with my deep meditation  and self-assessment lately, I know this is  leading me to somewhere. Hey, I even now have the mojo to blog.

I practice slow food. I cook my own meal. Although at times, I can't help but to eat out when in meetings or with friends. I chew my food. I try to discipline myself to c-h-e-w slowly as possible. To digest it slowly. I lessen my sugar and meat and coffee intake.Not entirely, but still trying.

And today, I am learning and enjoying yoga. I am listening to my body, inhaling and exhaling. I am still getting the tricks of it. I'll get the hang of this soon.

I have a confession to make, I am a shallow breather. Even in sleep, you might get frightened that I am not breathing anymore, that I died in sleep. Truth is, I am a shallow breather. I do not know how to breathe properly.

I read from an article that learning how to breathe properly is important, we don't pay attention to our breathing. Guilty. Check! As a shallow breather, I am only using 15% of my lung capacity. So therefore, only 20 million pores in my lungs is receiving oxygen. I am depriving the remaining 53 million pores!

But, I am positive that it is not too late to learn how to breathe properly. I know that today is the start of something new in my lifestyle, yes, as simple as eating slow and breathing properly.  It would actually rob me some of my work time but the rewards of having a longer and healthier life would not only be beneficial for me but for my loved ones as well.

Change is good when it's going to make someone better, right? Yoga is my first babystep to a future better self.

💗
Om Shanti.


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